Glasto Roast 2019

Started by Matt2112, June 29, 2019, 00:35:22 am

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Matt2112

June 29, 2019, 00:35:22 am Last Edit: June 29, 2019, 04:00:27 am by Matt2112
It's that time again! 

Yep, two short years on from Ed Sheeran meekly busking with an out of tune acoustic guitar after Nile Rogers had torn the roof off, the oh-so-woke festival of virtue-filled, cloth-eared, selfie-taking socialist safe-spacers is back, surely the world's biggest gathering of vegans not quite cottoning on the irony of spending hundreds of pounds to party on a rich guy's dairy farm.

Friday headliner is down wit da kidz karaoke rap act "Stormzy".

Just when you thought that rappers headlining a rock n roll festival was proven to be an appalling move after the debacle of Kanjay West Z, someone's had the bright idea to put on his much angrier British counterpart, pants literally pulled down past his arse, peppering his set with terrible cover versions of already bad songs, where lazy, tedious f-bombs stand in for witty turns of phrase and the free pass his ilk get to liberally spray around the word "nigga" is used with relish and lapped up by shoulder-riding 12-year-old girls.

It's supposed to be edgy; it actually comes across as more of a Brass Eye style parody, except it's infinitely more boring.

Folks, is this what this event is really for?

So let's hit the BBC Red Button and watch Sheryl Crow instead.

Oh, this is so much more like it. Songs - actual songs - and breezy crowd-pleasers at that.  She looks great, too: mirrored shades reflecting the masses, wielding a big Gibson acoustic, tight shiny pants, great hair still.  Alexa tells us Sheryl Crow is 57 years old. We don't have to ask how much cooler she is than a rapper half her age.
The keys to happiness

Nïckslïkk2112

Just saw a bloke playing geetar with his teeth, never expected that at Glasto. No idea who he was looked a bit like Tim Minchin.

Tame Impala are dull, yet I liked Innerspeaker, even if it was a poor man's Dungen. 

Wonder if any of today's Acid Mothers Temple set got filmed?
Legend in my own Mind


Matt2112

Watched The Charlatans.

Bit ropey.

Didn't play One To Another, possibly the best Britpop song ever.

Trampling on my memories of the sixth form common room.  :(
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zoony

Just read that Corbyn said that that Stomzys set will go down in British cultural history. Well I guess we're used to that prick talking nothing but bollocks anyway. What a load of shit! I've never heard the bloke, but I just abhor that style of 'music' anyway. Makes me want to vomit.

Matt2112

Well Corbyn's down wif da Minnellials, innit.

They'll all get a shock when Gen Z are at the wheel.
The keys to happiness

Matt2112

Anne-Marie - yet another bland, pitchy pop starlet enjoying her 15 minutes.

The Wombats - identikit Indie with dodgy chops and toe-curling patter.

Pfft...can't even be arsed taking the piss out of this lot now.  

Let's just wait for The Killers, a band whose songs are big enough to suit the occasion.
The keys to happiness

döm

Quote from: Matt2112 on June 29, 2019, 20:42:01 pmAnne-Marie - yet another bland, pitchy pop starlet enjoying her 15 minutes.

The Wombats - identikit Indie with dodgy chops and toe-curling patter.

Pfft...can't even be arsed taking the piss out of this lot now. 

Let's just wait for The Killers, a band whose songs are big enough to suit the occasion.
They made a huge mess of their last appearance 12 years ago. Hopefully they can improve this time round
You can check out any time you like but you can never leave!

Nick

Enjoyed Lukas Nelson, new to me but the son of Willie Nelson.
Everybody's got to evalate from the norm.

DavidL

June 30, 2019, 08:58:58 am #8 Last Edit: June 30, 2019, 09:03:27 am by DavidL Reason: Addition
I was surprised to see creepy, tax-dodging comic Jimmy Carr make an appearance during The Kllers' set last night. Sets Glasto's diversity credentials back years by indulging someone with such abhorrent views on the Dwarf community.
Should've made the likes of Clooney, Thompson, Coogan and Corbyn rush to the helipad. Bad form from the well-off, methane-producing socialist Eavis.

Matt2112

The Killers smashed it; inspired guest appearances toward the end (not Carr's cameo) and rousing last few songs. 

I once saw them as a support band at Leeds Cockpit; they've come a long, long way.

My only reservation is that they haven't produced a real doozy since Human and they can't keep depending on the old crowd-pleasers.  They can put on a show, though.
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pdw1

Gojira were there on Friday  8)
but can't find them anywhere on the BBC coverage  >:(
Better drowned than duffers if not duffers wont drown

Matt2112

Oh dear...how bad was Janet Jackson; vocally awful, looked to be miming most of the time, and managed to make well-crafted dance pop sound dull as ditchwater.

Disappointed with that.
The keys to happiness

Matt2112

Lewis Capaldi.

Overwrought Ed Sheeran clone with gags.

Bland, bland, bland...next.
The keys to happiness

rufus the dawg

Quote from: pdw1 on June 30, 2019, 10:58:03 amGojira were there on Friday  8)
but can't find them anywhere on the BBC coverage  >:(
Here you go.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrEIUtR2PRA

I was hoping for some Hawkwind!

I thought the killers was pretty rubbish full of energy that went nowhere, sorry everyone; pretty standard guitar stuff.

Nïckslïkk2112

I see someone was signing for Stormzy. I trust they were just making the Wanker sign...
Legend in my own Mind